Experts still don’t know how they work, and new research finds little evidence of long-term benefit — You’ve probably heard that mental health disorders, including depression, are caused by chemical imbalances in a person’s brain. You’ve probably also heard that antidepressant drugs work by correcting these chemical imbalances. None of this appears to be true. The so-called “chemical imbalance theory” of mental illness, though once widely embraced…

Why simply being likable isn’t enough. — Jamie was surprised. He thought his friendships were solid. He was never short of people to hang out with and never had to wonder if people liked him. They did. They told him this all the time. Yet, when his girlfriend unexpectedly broke up with him and told him that…

Little “t” trauma may not be so little, after all. — If you asked me a few years ago if I had any trauma, I would’ve politely declined. Now, three years, 12 Ayahuasca ceremonies, countless breathwork sessions, a 10-day silent retreat and hours of parts work therapy later, I know better. Of course, I have trauma. Why else would I be…

Benefits of combining therapy modalities The last time I sat through a traditional talk therapy session was early 2017. At the time, my military life had moved me to the only duty stationed I never wanted to move to… The middle of the snow belt. Seasonal depression, chronic depression, and…

Or is this another tired, old script? — What is it about a sad woman that so intrigues a man? People always tell me the same story about this. That men love to act out the knight in shining armor role. That the deepest part of their masculinity is inflamed by a damsel with a tear-streaked face. …

Lessons learned from marriage and divorce — It’s cynical, but every time someone very young announces their engagement, I automatically congratulate them on their first marriage. Silently, of course. With the divorce rate being what it is, one would think that fewer couples would be in a hurry to rush down the aisle, choosing instead to take…

Gems of wisdom and integrity that you cannot afford to miss out on — The Internet is quite possibly the best and the worst thing to have happened to mankind. Having access to infinite knowledge at one’s fingertips has been the great equalizer for every man, irrespective of where he/she comes from. It is, however, a double-edged sword. With attention spans at rock bottom…

Getting clear on a form of abuse that thrives in confusion. Have you been a victim of emotional abuse? The signs aren’t always easy to spot. — by E.B. Johnson Have you been a victim of emotional abuse? It is estimated that 80% of adults have experienced or survived emotional abuse at some point in their lifetime. That’s a staggering number. So why don’t more of us talk about our pain or our experiences? The hard-to-swallow truth…

Pavlovian science meets modern-day romance — You can flip a mental switch to trigger almost instant emotional states and physical reactions. The mental switch is called a “trigger” in science, hypnosis, and neurolinguistic programming. Essentially, you hijack the psychological principles of classical conditioning and apply them to your desired state. In our case, explosive orgasms on…

By Brianna Wiest Emotional intelligence is not how infrequently you feel anything “bad” because you’ve developed the discipline and wisdom “not to.” It’s not how easily you choose what you think, how you let it affect you, or how placidly you react to any given situation. Real emotional maturity is…

If you’re a people-pleaser, someone who thinks of themselves as “being” nice, or know anyone in that regard then this one is for you. Now, don’t get me wrong, there’s nothing wrong with being nice and being seen as such but could there be more to those of us who…

Real talk from a clinical psychologist — Depression is a multifaceted mental health condition. The symptoms of depression and its severity vary from person to person. One person might have functional depression, meaning they have symptoms of depression but are still able to carry out day-to-day activities. …

Shame can become toxic for all genders, but for men, shame presents a particular catch-22. (Photo by Kat J on Unsplash) By Dr T J Jordan We give our boys very conflicting messages. We teach them to pursue strength and to avoid weakness. We warn them not to be overly…

and everything to do with psychopathology — The current view on Intimate Partner Violence (IPV) mainly focuses on the role of patriarchy and male domination of women. Feminists ask the following question: Why do men beat their wives? Instead of: Why do some people abuse? What psychopathology leads to abusive conduct? What they seek to understand is…

It’s not the reason you think — It’s popular to say that what are termed “bad boys” get all the girls and what are termed “nice guys” don’t, it’s also popular to say that “nice guys” finish last. But the problem is nobody even really knows what a “bad boy” is defined as nor what a “nice…

How to integrate feelings back into your life a little at a time — As a child, I was taught that feelings were bad and that my job was to “control” them. I didn’t know what that meant but through a series of non-verbal and non-cognitive processes, I learned somehow to repress my feelings. This led to somatic issues such as grinding my teeth…

Insights that can help you help a friend — or yourself — to see the light — Maybe you’re trying to help someone understand they deserve better. Or maybe you’re like I was long ago: your relationship makes you feel crappy more than happy, and you can’t figure out why. …

Could women be to blame for the reason why men don’t seek emotional support? — I remember when my friend Brig hit us up during a moment of arguments with his then-wife. Brig was the explosively wild, happy-go-lucky tweaker who we all know and love. I wrote about him before, but this is not about the abusive side of his relationship. At one point, Brig…

Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere. They’re in each other all along. ― Rumi — “Again, I am left with a broken heart. I wonder why did I fall in love again?” The message beeped in the middle of the night. The desperation of my friend was peeping through the screen of my phone. Instantly, laughter echoed in my room. It was a relief that…